Change You Can't Believe!

Oy, such changety-hopety-change! You shouldn't know from it!

So, Chicago Congressman Rahm Emanuel is going to be Barack Obama's Chief Of Staff, eh? I'm sure he is a Washington outsider who has no connection to the same old politics of the past (like Joe Biden, that fresh-faced newcomer!). I'm also certain that he reflects all of Obama's "liberal" views on the war, and since the "centrist" DLC is the most eeeeevilll organization EVAH according to our fauxgressive brethren, I'm positive that he would never touch such an organization with a ten-foot pole!

Whoops.

Looks like Emanuel has been working in Democratic politics since 1984. He was with Bill Clinton from 1991 (when he was the campaign's finance director) to 1998. He is a member of the DLC, and here is his record on the war:

Emanuel supported the October 2002 joint Congressional resolution authorizing the Iraq War, differentiating himself from all nine other Democratic members of the Illinois Congressional delegation (Sen. Richard Durbin, Reps. Bobby Rush, Jesse Jackson, Jr., Bill Lipinski, Luis Gutiérrez, Danny K. Davis, Jan Schakowsky, Jerry Costello and Evans) elected in 2002.[14] .

Oh, and remember when Jesse Jackson promised that the Zionists's hold on American politics would be loosened? If you thought he meant AIPAC and was not being a wacked-out anti-Semite, get used to disappointment. Emanuel has already introduced Obama to AIPAC and is extremely pro-Israel. Ain't nothin' gonna change there either.

Another stellar possible Cabinet member from the Clinton era is Larry Summers for Treasury Secretary. After Summers left the Administration, he became the President of Harvard. He did not exactly cover himself in glory.

Many of you will remember Larry Summers. He is the sexist former President of Harvard University who infamously said: “There are issues of intrinsic aptitude, and particularly of the variability of aptitude, and that those considerations are reinforced by what are in fact lesser factors involving socialization and continuing discrimination.” In other words, according to Larry, boys are better than girls at math – they’re just born that way. Shortly after this asinine comment, Larry was summarily dismissed (e.g. FIRED) from Harvard.

Misogynists of a feather flock together. I guess Larry Summers, despite his bizarre pseudo-scientific views on the female sex, is "likeable enough."

By the way, I have already received an email from a fauxgressive action group, stating that what we have to do now is kick Joe Lieberman out of the Democratic Party.

My God, you Obamabots are clueless. SHAME ON YOU. Your problem is not Joe Lieberman, but Barack Obama. Joe "Short Bus" Lieberman, in all his neocon splendor and misogyny, is the face of the New Obama Administration. Rahm Emanuel IS Joe Lieberman. Your hysterical blindness has caused you to elect the very people you claimed to despise.

You said you hated Hillary because she was a Washington insider, a member of the DLC, a relic of the "failed" (LOLOLOLOLOL) Clinton Administration, and a supporter of the Iraq War. And this description differs from Barack Obama's Cabinet picks in what way? Oh yes, I forgot - le scary vah-jayjay! Don't worry, though, folks. I'm sure there will be far fewer females in Obama's cabinet than there would have in Hillary's or McCain's. Silver lining, baybee!

The same old people are going to take control of this Administration. Obama, like Bush, was just a used-car salesman who seemed to be offering something new and shiny, but it turns out, had just given an old junker a shiny paint job. Bush dragged Nixonian and Reaganite relics into his Administration, and Barack Obama will drag Reaganite and Clintonite relics into his. (Look for our favorite war criminal, Colin Powell, to have a role too. After all, we must reward the people who promoted the war that we pretended to disagree with, right?)

The Onion has it right. You are all hilarious and pathetic. Enjoy your shiny new car while it lasts; but don't be surprised if it starts to develop an alarming rattle very shortly. Will you even notice, or will you pretend it sounds like hope and change?